Monday, March 30, 2009

CHECK PLEASE!



Finally!!!! the ceremony is in may... but the classes are OVER for now. I made it through, I passed my National Board exam, and all I have to do for now is wait on my licence so I can work. well... theres that and the whole "what are you going to do with your future" question mom and dad keep asking. Dad wants me to continue with school. ok... i have no problem with that, im in debt up past my eyeballs with student loans that i will be paying until i retire anyway, so, whats another several thousand added on at this point anyway, right? plus, i have been wanting to check a bit more into that whole acupuncture/hellraiser kinda modality anyway and there are some good schools out there...so...its a plan.

song: time of your life, green day

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

fear

does it frighten you to know someone knows you,
almost as well as you know yourself?
maybe even better at times?
is it awkward or scary to realize,
that someone knows what you see, hear, feel, and know?
the nightmares, the screams, the panic, the cold sweats
the taste, the smell, the feel, of a breath
the echoing sound and chills up your spine,
the thoughts of tortures that never leave your mind
the self induced comas featuring daily flashbacks.
it doesn't go away.
not completely.
not for long.
alone its too hard to bear...
yet just as equally disturbing,
its too difficult to share
no one wants to give that burden to anyone else.
who would want to take it?
why would anyone ask for such twisted torment?
no one really does.
some just eventually give in and accept.
its just how its going to be
aching for those arms that cradle you tight,
the kiss on the forehead, making it all right?
they will always be there, unafraid of the fear
used to what is and what will be
stronger than self accreditation,
but aware.